How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
