im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Your cock deserves a montage
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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