Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize