nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
