in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
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