is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
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