His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize