I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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