id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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