The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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