just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
