clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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