What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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