May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
