Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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