I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
