the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Randomize