I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
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