So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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