She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
