why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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