My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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