what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
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