If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Randomize
