sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Randomize
