who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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