so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
