I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Still dying that you shit outside
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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