'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
did i walk over a car last night?
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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