I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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