I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
there is another microwave in the elevator.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
