Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
