come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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