Im at strip club and am horny
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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