you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
You are the jesus of drinking
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
