At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
