I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
