Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
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