it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
All I want is dick and wine.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Randomize