Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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