We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
