Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
