I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
