Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
