This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Randomize