no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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