There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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