Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize