hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize