Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
