His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I just gargled with NyQuil
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize