dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
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